Back home, back online

Okay, so while the laptop is still banged up, at least the desktop is up and running, if not convenient for chasing two monkeys, getting caught up on e-mail, banking, etc., and accomplishing anything else. Its good to be home, and good to be back online with the conveniences of home (like cable and internet!). I have had two more appointments with my doctors - one for a fetal echocardiogram and one normal prenatal appointment.

The echocardiogram went really well, and the baby's small defect seems to have resolved itself for the most part. She said that it is more difficult to see through the ribcage now that baby's ribs are developing more solidly, and that there are shadows she had to look through/around and that there is a small chance a slight defect still exists, but she felt confident it had resolved itself.

I have also been a touch worried that this baby was breech because K was, and also because I've been feeling either a foot or a hand outside of my ribcage lately, and it turns out it was/is definitely a foot. Baby is head down and ready to come out and play soon. Toward that end, the high risk doctor would like for me to think about induction around 37 weeks if conditions are favorable. My initial thought is NO! I don't want to end up having a repeat c-section because baby is not ready to come out and we try to force the issue. Her logic centers on the increased possibility of stillbirth that comes with children of diabetic moms, which I will continue to research. I haven't heard much about this, and will therefore have to look at whether or not this is a realistic concern.

She also suggested an amnio at around 37 weeks to determine the readiness of the lungs. BUT since amnios can cause birth/labor, what if that amnio creates a birth situation in which baby will come before he or she is ready because we forced the issue and then has immature lungs, because we tried to see if the lungs were ready? Again, something I will have to look into before a decision is made.

All-in-all, the possibility now exists for a baby within the next 4-5 weeks, which is mind boggling, and I feel like I have much to do and miles to go before I sleep. I guess it works out well that I have already developed my late-term insomnia so that I will have plenty of time to think things through and search for information. I haven't confirmed arrangements for H and K yet, and I fear a repeat c-section that will require a hospital stay that is too much for them to handle, and too much for me as well. On a rational front, I know that it will all work itself out, but as with most things parenting, I think you tend to worry whether or not you're doing it all right. Maybe you never do, but you can't help but worry...